dorm woebegone

Here are some random thoughts and memories about living in the dormitories. I'm somewhat of an expert on this because I had almost twenty semesters of experience under my belt.

* If you were a glutton for punishment and took summer classes, there was never any hot water. Or you had to hike to the gym with your shower stuff if you wanted to take a hot shower.

* Dorm food sucked. It didn't take long to figure out that you really didn't want a meal plan. However, I knew of lots of people who would steal plates, cups, trays and silverware out of Corlew Cafeteria for their personal collection. Or to play frisbee.

* Freshmen dorms. Enough said.

* RAs who liked to leave notes next to the elevator. I was most amused by RAs who could not write a paragraph... on more than one occasion I would correct their notes with a red pen, then slide them back under their door.

* Community bathrooms. Or --- one "good" shower out of six, and if you were there at the wrong time, you'd have to use the "bad" shower. Also, the random dirty things you'd find in the shower -- panties, toothbrushes, other people's poo, etc.

* Mandatory dorm meetings.

* Lobby rats. These are the people who had nothing better to do than sit in the lobby and watch the big-screen.

* The Hater says: RAs who made no effort to stop idiots from playing music very loud at 3am during finals week.

* The washer/dryer in the dorm. If you didn't sit with your clothes, people would put crayons in the dryer.

* Idiot neighbors who would spit tobacco in the hallway. (Another Hater addition)

* I didn't hate it, but I was amused by my neighbors who hid a cat all semester. I also knew of several people who hid gerbils and hamsters. I hid a fish, which doesn't sound nearly as exciting; his name was Fluffy.

* Opposite-gender curfew rules. You had to check them out by midnight -- OR ELSE hellfire and brimstone would rain down over campus!

* You had to move out of your room 5 hours after your last final on Christmas break, or it would cost you an extra $400. Or, if you were moving out for the summer, you had 24 hours to move. Although it would make sense that you wouldn't have to move if you had to move into the new dorm two days later -- you'd still have to move out, truck your stuff somewhere else, then bring it back to move for the summer.

* No candles or incense. And no alcohol. Of course we never broke those rules.

* I'm channeling Angry Dissenter for this one: the very annoying Housing lady who worked in the office. She was the most unhelpful person on campus. He'd be much more colorful about her than I am -- so maybe if you prod him, he'll tell you about it.

* The stale sweat smell that never left the halls.

* Tornado warnings where you had to sit in the lobby with a hundred other sweaty people for hours. And if you tried to leave, they'd threaten you. Those of us who got smarter would just hide in our rooms and not answer the door when they knocked.

* Likewise the fire drills. Especially when idiots pulled them at 3am during finals week... see the above 'smarter' statement. I learned to hide from the alarms and almost sleep through them.

* Living on the third floor of a dorm without an elevator.

* Parking. Not necessarily dorm-oriented, but it sucked to bring back groceries and have to park a half mile away. Then lug them across campus. You learned to buy things that didn't weigh much -- like ramen noodles.

I'm sure that more will come to me, but for now that's all I've got for you.