I would like to announce that one of my best friends in the world and I are about to undertake a writing project like none ever seen -- Yes, the book you have been waiting to add to your coffee table or proudly display on your mantle will soon enter its rough draft phase. We don't have a title for it yet, but it will be a humorous anthology of the best (or worst) bathroom experiences. This will include, but not be limited to personal narratives, limericks, best bathroom graffiti, and references to none other than Ronco, himself. Friends, while reading this book you'll laugh, you'll cry, and your eyes might even water with the scratch-and-sniff featurette... it truly will be the literary adventure you wish would have been required to read in high school.
Perhaps you've seen the 'bathroom edition' of many kinds of books... I've noticed editions for sports fans, holy rollers, crossword puzzles, useless trivia, cookbooks (which I do find somewhat frightening), classics... but I have yet to see a book that travels past the attempts to ignore the purpose of the throne. Friends, it's time we embrace those stories that have haunted us... it's time to fess up for being the person who farted and didn't claim it. It's time to support the cause of the unheard story that was not appropriate to be told.
Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time. Will you heed Mother Nature's call?
22 hours ago