Tater Tots

This is the second time I'm posting this story. I accidently deleted the first version. I'm sure it was a blogger problem and not pilot failure.

The Hater is playing Madden NFL '06 on the XBox. My job is to google players to see where they went to college. This job is not so fun, I think. I was benched because the players I control tend to fumble, and turnovers are bad.

If Xbox had a Madden DCI '06 game, I'd let him play the triangle.

Today marks one week and two days at my new job. I'm liking it way beter than the other job. They think I'm quiet and sweet with occasional streaks of wit and sarcasm... man, are they in for big surprises!

They tease me for being a misplaced country girl.
And I make fun of Uglyhoma, so I guess it's fair...

So today one of the nurses was asking about how I met The Hater. We met on the debate team at MTSU, I said. She wanted to know where he was from. This is the conversation that followed:

me: He's from East Tennessee, south of Knoxville.
her: Is East TN different from West TN?
me: Way different. The state is divided into East, Middle, and West TN - by the river.
her: And you're from Middle TN?
me: Yes, the LBG.
her: How is East TN different from Middle TN?
me: Well, for starters it has mountains.
her: Does that make any difference?
me: Have you ever met any mountain people?
her: No.
me: I tease The Hater for being a 'mountain people'.
her: I don't get it.
me: Have you ever heard of Tellico Plains, TN? He grew up close to there.
her: No. Should I have?
me: Dileverance was filmed there.
her: Dileverance? (big, scared eyes)
me: Yeah, you know, squeal like a piggy.
her: (silence) (bigger, scareder eyes)

And her first non-shock, coherant statement?

her: Does he wear a baseball cap all the time?

Not does he play the banjo. Not do we frequent the Tellico River. Not does he have all of his teeth. Not does he wear shoes. But does he wear a baseball hat... all the time.

The Hater would like it known that he grew up thirty minutes from Tellico Plains. And although he has a baseball cap, he does not wear it all the time. And he, indeed, has all of his teeth, except the ones that were pulled when he had braces.

It could have even been forty-five minutes away, The Hater adds, and I could play the football game with him if I wanted.

And I don't have to tell all of our secrets.